A Lesson in Trust

Yesterday morning part of a bible verse kept going through my head 'Trust in the Lord with all your heart...' (now, it is not my intent to be preaching in my blog, but with my faith being apart of who I am, these things just may come up from time to time). Round and round it went. Now, I am no stranger to trust. When Ezekiel was diagnosed I had to trust that I would be able to do whatever I needed to do to look after him (yes, even give scary needles!). Every day I have to trust that after I have done everything I know how to do my boy will be okay. That after we go to sleep he will wake up. But yesterday there was something new. Something exciting yet scary. A decision was made, but was it the right one?
For a long time i knew that I would be unable to continue on the path I was on: working full time in a somewhat stressful management position, getting up to check blood sugars in the night, going back and forth to the school to give Ezekiel his insulin at lunch or other times as needed. It was all becoming too much. I could not quit working without putting our family in financial trouble. (there is a difference between trusting and just being foolish. I think quitting and having no income would have been the latter.)
Then something happened. A job came up at Ezekiel's school. A job with the same number of hours I have now. A job that is very well suited to me. And a job with what I think will be a lot less stress. And a job with summers off. I could hear angels singing 'Hallelujah!' in the background as I read the ad. I knew the pay would be a couple of dollars an hour less than I make now and the summer layoff could be a bit tricky (EI is not the fastest most well paying benefit). But I decided to apply. I figured if I wasn't meant to have the job I wouldn't get it. Simple.
During the interview I made sure there was a benefit package, which there is (diabetes supplies are not cheap and our Pharmacare deductible is very high, but that is a blog for another day). And then i waited. Sure enough I got the job! Woo-hoo! I sadly gave my notice at my current job, which has been a great place to work and they have always been very good to me and very understanding when it comes to Ezekiel. Then I went to fill in the forms for my new job. That is when I became uncertain if I was doing the right thing.
First of all I discovered that it actually pays $4 an hour less than my current job as the salary was previously based on a different number of hours then what I will be working. Secondly I found out that because the position relies on funding, it is usually classified as a term position, which means while I can tap into the pension and life insurance benefits, I would not be eligible for the drug plan. But I had already resigned and until this moment I was certain this was the right thing to do.
I began to figure out how we would ever be able to fork out hundred's of dollars for Ezekiel's supplies. I started shopping for cheaper infusion sets, reminding myself I can claim the expenses on our income tax, and wondering if we could somehow use less test strips. Then I began to think, 'what if pay days are different? what if they hold a week back?' Trust. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.... I am doing the right thing, aren't I?
One of the school division forms needed my banking information so i had to take it home to fill it out. Upon bringing it in to the division office, I was told that they will give me the rate of pay they had first told me and they will classify my position as permanent as long as I understand it is still reliant on the funding. This means I would be eligible for the drug plan. I was shocked (albeit pleasantly so). I decided while I was there to ask about pay day dates. Turns out they have the EXACT same pay schedule I have now so there will be zero interruption in my paychecks. WOW.
So while part of me is sad to leave my current position, I am excited and looking forward to a new adventure. And I know that I am doing what is right for me and my family. And I know everything turn out fine, great even, because I can trust in the Lord with all my heart <3